(Featuring an Interview with Buffy’s Own, Amber Benson, who played Tara Maclay)
By Eleni Kontou
Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997-2003) is an incredibly progressive show for its time. With feminism and women at the forefront, it’s no wonder that the show has gained a place in the list of shows you will never stop hearing about. The characters and their relationships are what make the show so special. In fact, Buffy the Vampire Slayer was the first show on network television to feature a recurring sapphic couple.
Willow and Tara’s relationship depicted a natural and true progression of feelings between the characters. Willow, played by Alyson Hannigan, had a history of one relationship with a
man (Oz, played by Seth Green), and so her feelings towards Tara, played by Amber Benson, may have come as a surprise to some viewers and even to Willow herself. The show did well not to ponder on this though, Willow’s feelings for Tara were accepted with little doubt from either of the characters. Although it is frequently debated whether Willow is lesbian or bisexual etc., the show offers a heart-warming depiction of sapphic love. The natural progression of their relationship from friends to lovers helped to normalise wlw (women loving women) relationships instead of focusing on the male gaze that is so often at the forefront of wlw relationships on screen. Their love for one another was well thought out and displayed on screen, with both characters' accepting their feelings for one another with little to no doubt. The episode in which the couple first kiss is the same episode that Buffy’s mother, Joyce, dies. The kiss was one of comfort and love, one that prevented their love from being sexualised by the male gaze. Joss Whedon, the show’s creator, had to fight for the kiss to be aired on network television, threatening to quit if they didn’t let him show the physical side of Willow and Tara’s relationship.
Willow’s character progression takes a jump forward when she identifies her feelings for Tara. It is often the case for LGBTQ+ people to feel a weight off their shoulders when they come to terms with their sexuality and/or gender. Willow’s character seemingly getting a confidence boost from her identity and her relationship with Tara is a refreshing sight to see on television. Coming to terms with your sexuality/gender is often portrayed as dark and scary, Tara and Willow’s relationship shows that this is not always the case, or at least not the whole case. Sexuality can have the effect of an awakening to many, it represents the dropping of the heteronormative behaviour that is ingrained into society. Willow and Tara’s relationship has a blossoming impact on Willow’s character, one that gives her strength and confidence. This hint of power coming hand in hand with accepting yourself is an incredibly important and progressive approach for a show that was aired in the late ‘90s and early ‘00s.
The acceptance from those around them was/is also an important situation depicted on the show. The media is very quick to portray difficulties with acceptance, and while these stories are also important, it is perhaps more important to show coming out stories in a positive light. This normalises the idea of non-heterosexual relationships and allows LGBTQ+ people to see themselves not struggling on screen for once. Willow and Tara’s relationship was and still is, so powerful for those coming to terms with their sexuality. It provides power and an insight into true wlw relationships that other shows at the time just didn’t. Even now, the representation of LGBTQ+ characters is lacking, but it is fair to say that Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its introduction of Tara to the show progressed the introduction of gay characters on our screens. A standout scene is when Willow first ‘comes out’, she confides her relationship with Tara to Buffy, in a scene that is one of the first representations of ‘coming out’ shown on television. Buffy’s initial reaction is one of shock, although after thinking about it for a moment, she realises that she loves Willow and that sexuality does not matter. The script was important in showing the audience what ‘coming out’ can look like, while also being progressive in showing acceptance. Another key moment is when the ‘scooby gang’ accept Tara as part of their own family. They defend her in front of her own parents in a scene of acceptance of both Tara and Willow. The characters on the show accepting Tara as one of them, and therefore accepting Willow and Tara’s relationship, is an important and pivotal scene for network television. The relationship between Willow and Tara helped people to come to terms with their own sexuality and made them feel seen and heard on a show with such a massive following. The lack of LGBTQ+ representation on television can lead to people not truly understanding their sexuality until later in life. It can sometimes be hard to understand feelings when depictions of them are not displayed to you in the media. Therefore, shows such as Buffy the Vampire Slayer displaying wlw relationships is helpful to those coming to terms with their sexuality as it helps them to identify themselves within the characters.
The show does have its faults in terms of some references and language, however Amber Benson, who played Tara Maclay on the show, states that:
"I think there are dated things about the show…but it amazingly still holds up pretty well all these years later.”
The show was way ahead of its time, and to this day, Willow and Tara’s relationship remains beautiful and representative. It is a relationship that represents the progression that we need more of on screens, even now, almost 20 years later. A reboot of the show is also in the works and Benson comments that:
“I’m definitely excited for a reboot with a more diverse cast. I think that would be a wonderful thing.”
A diverse cast is important in terms of the LGBTQ+ community and to BIPOC. Hopefully, the reboot takes into account the importance of diversity, and the importance of seeing yourself in characters on television shows.
A fault that the show made in terms of Willow and Tara’s relationship is the censorship of their sex life in comparison to straight relationships on the show. This is often seen on TV shows due to the acknowledgment of the male gaze. Benson observes:
“It was frustrating at first. It felt censorious…but then someone from our crew took us aside and said: What’s important is that this relationship is being seen in millions of homes every week and it’s normalizing the LGBTQ+ experience…whether Willow and Tara make out isn’t what’s most important right now…it’s that minds are being opened…opinions are being changed.
So...do I personally think there should have been more of a physical representation of the love that Willow/Tara shared? I do. I think it’s important to be honest and show well-rounded LGBTQ+ relationships, including physical representations of love and sex. And though we got censored in the beginning, I know that as the show went on Joss and the writers fought hard to show a more well-rounded version of Willow and Tara’s physical relationship.”
The lack of sexual relations shown on screen between Willow and Tara was a way in which the writers prevented the relationship from being sexualised by the male gaze. The couple doing magic together was often used as symbolism of their sex life, witnessed in the scene where Willow and Tara are doing a spell together that ends with Willow gasping and falling back onto a pillow. The scenes were cleverly used as a way of getting around the restrictions placed on the show at the time, while also avoiding that of the male gaze.
The musical episode has many key scenes with Willow and Tara, such as the humorous line ‘I’m cured. I want the boys’. The light-hearted humour draws attention to one of the many issues that LGBTQ+ people face - the idea that LGBTQ+ people can be ‘cured’. The episode also features Amber Benson’s favourite outfit:
“Uhm, the princess dress from the musical…how could it be anything else?! :)”
In terms of acknowledgement of LGBTQ+ struggles, Buffy the Vampire Slayer highlights this in a dark, humorous way that shines a light on some of the misrepresentations and ignorance that LGBTQ+ people face. In not bringing to light their sexual relationship as such, the writers brought attention to and normalised other aspects of sapphic relationships. The censorship of Willow and Tara’s sex life perhaps allowed for more focus on their love for one another and didn’t risk it being altered by the male gaze. However, Willow does go on to meet Kennedy after Tara’s death and they share a sex scene that is the first wlw sex scene on primetime television. It’s just unfortunate that it wasn’t Willow and Tara, considering that they were the ones who initiated the progress.
The death of Tara in the show is one that is painful to LGBTQ+ people to this day. The ‘bury your gays’ trope occurs frequently in television, it gives way to the idea that gay characters are more expendable than those that are heteronormative. LGBTQ+ characters take up such a small percentage of characters on television as it is, and therefore killing gay characters off feels unjust at this moment in time. Since 1976 from the show Executive Suite, to more recent examples such as The 100, Orange is the New Black, The Walking Dead, and even in television soaps such as Coronation Street when they killed Rana on her and Kate’s wedding day. Those listed are just a small portion of those that have done the exact same thing. There have been around 212 lesbian and bisexual character deaths on television so far, according to Autostraddle. The high number is even more tragic when you think about the lack of LGBTQ+ representation on television as it is. This does not necessarily mean that LGBTQ+ characters should be indestructible, of course there will be deaths on shows such as The Walking Dead, and Tara’s death in Buffy the Vampire Slayer did progress Willow’s storyline. However, it is hard to look positively at a death that adds to the body count of an already underrepresented community. The problem is not that the gay characters are killed off, but rather that in a show full of straight characters, it seems as though the gay characters are targeted. It feels as if they try to humanise being LGBTQ+ by killing somebody off in order to encourage emotion and sympathy within people, focusing on straight viewers rather than the LGBTQ+ audience and how they feel. It is also apparent that some shows introduce gay characters in order to be praised for their inclusivity, without actually wanting to feature it. Tara’s death was shocking and came not long after the couple had reconciled their relationship. Amber Benson’s take is that:
“I understood why Tara was killed - it was the only way to have the Dark Willow storyline - but, like the fans, I hated it. I wish it hadn’t happened the way it did. [...]
There’s no way to know what would’ve happened if Tara had lived. Would the continuation of the relationship have helped move along the conversation about representation faster and farther? Quite possibly so. I just know I personally would have been happier if she had lived!”
Despite the heartache at Tara’s death, it is undeniable that the couple provided a positive and thoughtful platform for wlw relationships, regardless of censorship. A platform that brought attention to the importance of portraying LGBTQ+ lives on screen. When talking about the relationship’s importance, Benson writes:
“Once we realized that Willow and Tara were becoming ‘more than friends’, I think both Aly [Alyson Hannigan who played Willow on the show] and I understood this was going to be important. That the way Joss [Whedon] was writing the relationship…ignoring what a lot of shows were doing back then, aka creating titillation by having two girls making out on screen…and, instead, making the relationship about two people - who both happen to be women - falling in love and supporting each other and becoming part of a ‘found family’. By normalizing the Willow/Tara relationship, the show really did help to open a dialogue that would go on to change how representation was handled on television.”
Benson has no regrets in taking on the role of Tara:
“Playing Tara is one of the things I’m most proud of in my life…so it doesn’t matter whether or not it impacted my career. I’d do it all again in a heartbeat.”
The introduction of Willow and Tara’s relationship to network television was a beautiful and meaningful portrayal that impacted many lives and brought about many conversations and progression. The show really helped to bring forward more inclusion for LGBTQ+ people on screen and made people feel more accepted while also normalising wlw relationships in a way that didn’t adhere to the male gaze. When asked about the show's impact, Benson commented:
“It makes me so happy. The relationship between Willow and Tara is a beautiful thing - and it was an honor to be a part of it. It's amazing that the show - and the Willow/Tara relationship - still has the power to impact lives the way it did twenty years ago when it first aired.”
The impact of the show is undeniable when it comes to LGBTQ+ representation. Willow and Tara’s relationship/impact has us hailing them as heroes almost two decades after the show has finished.
Thank you to Amber Benson for taking the time to get involved with this piece.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer is currently available to stream on Amazon Prime, and it is also free to stream on All 4 in the UK.
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